If I was born in the United States, maybe in the 50’s or 60’s, I can bet I would turn out to be one of those conspiracy theorists, earning big money on writing books and doing lecture tours all over the world. But sadly enough I’m Swedish and therefore blessed with a critical mind and might a bit more boring than the typical interviewee at Ancient Aliens. But still, for some reason I’m a big fan of conspiracy documentaries and books - even if the quality of them is generally very bad. Last week I had the dubious pleasure of watching no less than four of them, and here’s my rundown, whether you like it or not! ;)
First out is The Hidden Hand: Alien Contact and the Government Cover-Up (2013). Now, I watch a lot of movies every week so already my memory starts to fade. But what I can remember is that it was entertaining, and had a couple of interesting parts. I especially appreciate the interviews with veterans - even if I doubt some of them really are the real deal, people have a tendency to over-exaggerate their own importance. But the wildest part is towards the end where a support group of abductees talks about all the different ways they’ve been sexually molested by aliens! What leads up to this is how often it starts in the childhood, with the alien taking the shape of a clown. I won’t say what I believe, but Gregg Araki’s masterpiece Mysterious Skin from 2004 might give a clue or two. Anyway, this doc was better than the title suggested.
Next up is JFK: The Smoking Gun (2013), a TV-special which of course deals with the Kennedy assassination, what else? Like about one trillion other fools out there I find this case interesting and yeah, exciting. It something so waste and complicated and with a lot of paths in all directions. Here they’re focusing on the third bullet, the one that almost ripped the head off Kennedy - and why it behaved differently than the other hits. I really - to be honest - had no idea about the theory presented here, but what I understand it’s been around for quite some time (which is mentioned in the doc), but it’s indeed a “fun” and thought-provoking theory. The production is a bit drawn out, but with very well-made reconstructions and quite an impressive line of facts I had no clue about. I guess real conspiracy theorists think this is bullshit, but I like it. It’s not bad. Recommended.
Unlawful Killing (2011) is probably the only controversial documentary here, created by Keith Allen, a British actor and comedian. It tells the quite convincing story of Lady Diana being assassinated by the royal family. We all know that royals are inbred twats, that’s for sure, so that might give this production a more convincing aura than it normally would have if it was about… something so ridiculous as the infamous Crisis Actor conspiracy. With a dry sense of humor (it’s very British) Allen tells us about why and how, with more than few delightful attacks towards the royal family. It’s a lot of fun, clears some facts from the mess surrounding the investigation, and even introduces a possible responsible person for the killing. Legal problems stopped it from being released, but nowadays it’s easy to find on the net.
The fourth one is Aliens on the Moon: the Truth Exposed (2014), a “documentary” (I can’t write that without quotation marks, sorry. This bastard was produced for SyFy, which might explain the utter stupidity we’ve learned to love in their TV-movies and other productions. It’s a lot like the later seasons of Ancient Aliens, where every sign of quality just disappeared. Here we’re presented with not that many photos of the moon surface and random morons presenting it as evidence for alien lifeforms. We see, what they claim is, ruins - or not even that, it’s full fledged moon bases, towers, nuclear plants or… yeah, you get the point. I love silly conspiracy ideas (because NASA is hiding this fact!!!) like this, but this is just too fucking stupid. And it’s boring. And they even show footage of some fucking moon woman who’s already proven to be the work of a video artist! Avoid. AVOID!
That’s it. I was afraid for a while I would go mad watching all this, and even felt a slight depression hovering over me because these documentaries not only presents fantastic ideas, they also tells us quite frankly about the cynicism of humanity, governments, conspiracy theorists - and that we’re all still searching for something out there. Why can’t we find it? Is that the curse of being a human: we can never be happy with what we got.
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